Tuesday, August 28, 2007

"I think I am having some culture shock"-Kate




Well, sure enough, you start patting yourself on the back about what a good traveler you are and how you love the world and then you smack into a large and painful wall, called "culture shock." I have some pictures that I will be sure to post here today. I will try to get through as much as I can to explain all that has happened in the last few days, and I also plan to be honest. (Although I much prefer "Kate the world traveler".)

Ok, so yesterday we had to wait until 2:30 to get Kai. What a long day! When we finally got into the car and headed towards the Civil Affairs Bureau I was already almost sick with anticipation. Good though. I cannot describe driving through the city streets to get there. The streets are the size of our alleys, lined withe open shops, people on bikes and walking around. We were curving and swerving and you could not see the sky for all the high rise apartment buildings that line the streets. When we got there we walked down this alley and all of a sudden 3 nanny's carrying baby girls ran across the street while a group of about 20 couples ran out of the building clutching their babies wide eyed. I didn't realize it was sprinkling and they were running to get out of the rain, it just seemed like this massive baby race.


This stunned me. But then we got on the elevator and headed up to the room to receive Kai. He came toddling out, wearing a brand new outfit and a Colts hat waving hello, huge smile on his face. He immediately came to Josh and I, no crying, no problem, all smiles. When I took off his hat I noticed that his head was sort of misshaped. (Cue the massive panic please.)


I asked about his head. Our guide and his Nanny looked at it and laughed, "Chinese head" they said. I guess this is very common in the Chinese culture period but even more common with children from orphanages. But all of a sudden, just what we were doing hit me very hard and scared the crap out of me. This is our son, he is ours now. We had waited so long, worked so hard, anticipated so much. My brain was on overload. And so, as we drove back home, Kai laughed with Josh, talked away, and did fine. Meanwhile, my face turned bright red and I felt a strong desire to you-know-what. Kai was adorable, happy and very well-adjusted and I was feeling scared.


Anyway, I called my parents and they talked to me. I have the best parents in the world! Josh and I are so fortunate to have the parents we do. Dad suggested that maybe I had seen "more of the real China" and was having culture shock. As I surveyed how I was feeling, I realized he was exactly right.


This morning things are much better. We talked to our coordinator and she also said this is very common. Plus, Kai has been charming the pants off of everyone. To prepare for this trip I read every book I could get my hands on about bonding and adjustment. And this kid seems to have made the transition seamlessly. So much for research! Let me share a bit with you about him.


1. He is quick to giggle and laugh. He has a raspy little voice.

2. He loves to play and already says many English words.

3. When we went into the hotel playroom for the kids he played so sweetly with a little baby boy, so gentle. All the families in there could not believe that we hadn't had him 24 hours yet.

4. He talks to every waitress and person we see. Many people are stopping us on the street to talk to him.

5. He does suck his thumb to fall asleep and makes little slurping noises.

6. He is eating A LOT. I am trying to make sure he doesn't get sick. With my nerves he has out eaten me at every meal so far. He is not picky and likes everything we have given him.


Ok, so why the easy transition? Judy, our guide has shared more with us about his orphange. It is located in Foshan, a very rich city. The orphanage is very small and very well supported by the community and the large industry there. I guess the caretakers and the director are paid very well there, and so theyare happy. The caretakers often take the children home with them for a night. Judy asked Kai if he had been out for an overnight stay before. He has. I guess they get very good care. Since this is such a prominent place, usually only children with special needs are given up for adoption. So, it is very small. Kai has said the name of a child that was adopted two months ago many times. He was seven years old and close to Kai. I guess all of them are very close. Pretty neat.


Well, that is about all I have time for today. We'll post again tomorrow. We are using our computer from the Starbucks here. Pretty nice.


We miss you all so much!



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